BFSU a dream forever?

I have no choice but going forward.
When I got the news, I just felt like crying. It was like a so-called pancake falling down from the heaven, ironically, it might come from the hell.
I don't want to give up my original dream, at the same time, I dare not take the challenge.
I don't know what and how to do. I have nothing, but myself.
At the very time I need you, you are not here.
Go~~~